Sleeping Soul
by ZannaBQ
Summary: The year that never was changed Jack in a way even he himself doesn't notice, and now Ianto has a secret that's even bigger than the Cyberwoman. JackxIanto
1. Prologue

**Title:** Sleeping Soul  
**Author:** Zanna  
**Beta:** Laren & Koryou  
**Disclaimer:** not mine  
**Warnings:** angst

**Summary:** The year that never was changed Jack in a way even he himself doesn't notice, and now Ianto has a secret that's even bigger than the Cyberwoman. Jack/Ianto

**A/N:** This story promises to get real long (due to the fact that I'm apparently not able to write anything with less than 10 chapters - unless it's an one-shot). It's not much yet, just the prologue, but I hope you'll enjoy it nevertheless (and tell me so :-)).

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**Prologue **

_TA scout ship V'exor  
somewhere en route between Treena IV and the TA headquarters  
24 May 5078_

Jack paced behind the force field like a caged tiger. The small contained space didn't allow for much movement and so this was the only way he could release some of his pent-up anger. The man on the other side of the force field watched him silently, not saying anything despite of the fact that it was him who had come to see Jack without being invited first. Not that Jack did have a choice in that matter.

"I want to know why," he finally pressed out between clenched teeth.

"Why?" The other man blinked at him.

"Yes! Why?" Jack stopped directly in front of the man and glared at him angrily. "Why, Ianto? Why did you betray me?"

Ianto looked at him silently for a long moment, then he sighed. "I didn't betray you, Jack."

The force field was the only thing holding Jack back from punching Ianto. He knew first-hand that it was no use throwing himself against it. The field wouldn't even flicker – it was constructed to hold way bigger and stronger species than humans – and it would hurt like hell. Although it was the first time that Jack was standing on _this_ side of the force field.

"Oh? Well from this side of the containment field it looks exactly like that's what you did!" Jack almost shook so angry was he. "You sold me to the Time Agency, for crying out loud! What did they pay you for that? I really hope it was enough!"

"They didn't pay me anything."

"So you're doing it for free?" Jack stared at Ianto's blank, emotionless face. "What is this then? Revenge? Because I shot Lisa? You figured you couldn't kill me, so you settled for the second best?"

"This has nothing to do with Lisa," Ianto answered, his voice cold like frosty wind. "It's…" Ianto stopped and took a deep breath. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you," he finally said.

"Try me!" Jack said, but Ianto just shook his head silently. Jack stared at him for another moment, trying to read what was going on in that mind behind the cool mask, but after what Ianto had done he doubted he had ever been able to read the Welshman correctly.

"Do you even have the faintest idea what they are going to do to me?" Jack finally whispered, hoping to appeal to some caring part inside this Ianto he suddenly didn't know anymore.

Ianto closed his eyes for a moment, then he looked directly at Jack. "I know exactly what they are going to do to you," he answered.

Jack narrowed his eyes, suddenly almost overwhelmed by fury and hatred. "If you think I'm going to forgive you like I did with your betrayals in the past, you are wrong," he hissed. "I'll never forgive you for this. And when I get out of here – and I will get out – I'll hunt you down, no matter where and when you are. And then I'll kill you, Ianto, with my bare hands. Slowly. Painfully. You better believe it."

Ianto stared at him for a long moment, a look of resignation, tiredness and hurt flicking over his face before it was arranged into the blank mask again. "I believe you, sir," he finally said. Then he turned around and walked out of the containment area. Leaving Jack behind, alone in his prison.

TBC


	2. Chapter 1

**Title:** Sleeping Soul  
**Author:** Zanna  
**Disclaimer&warnings: **see prologue  
**Beta:** Laren & Koryou

**A/N:** So, here it is, the first chapter. Sorry for the delay, it took me longer to finish it than I thought (RL got in the way). But I want to reassure you, that even if this is a WIP, I've never abandoned a story before. I already finished several multi-chapter stories (one of them had 37 chapters) – even though not in this fandom – and I plan on finishing this one. I never start a story before I really thought about where and when it will lead. I know exactly what will happen and why it will happen. Just the 'how' is not set in stone yet, the only 'work in process' in this story. I try to update once a week (and my Beta is always nagging me to write more, more, more, so there's no way I could forget ).

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**Chapter 1**

_The Hub  
Cardiff, Earth  
17 September 2008_

Ianto made a last round through the Hub before he closed down everything for the evening. Although Owen hadn't been there for hours to leave clutter wherever he went the Hub was weird in that matter. Things appeared at places they shouldn't be, so Ianto liked to take a last look every evening before he went home.

But everything seemed to be alright and Ianto just powered down the workstations – every one but Tosh's as she was the only one who left her computer working on purpose. Owen and Gwen just seemed to be too lazy to do it by themselves.

On his way out he cast a last glance at Jack's office. If Jack was still there Ianto would offer him a coffee before he went, but the office was empty. The faint glow from the manhole indicated that Jack had called it an early night today, and Ianto didn't want to disturb him.

After locking the door to the tourist information Ianto went to his car, got inside and started his way home. He could have gotten a flat within walking distance to the hub, he guessed, but he liked his little house in the suburbs. And sometimes he was more than glad to be as far away from Torchwood as possible.

The streets where quiet and empty this late in the evening causing Ianto's mind to start wandering; just like always in the last few days it wandered to Jack. Since his return almost a week ago Jack had been… different.

It wasn't really a noticeable change – Ianto doubted that one of the others noticed anything – but Ianto was used to watching Jack unobtrusively. It was a habit that was hard to break, even after Jack had left them without a word and returned just as sudden and without an explanation.

They knew, of course, that Jack had left with the Doctor. Ianto and Tosh had recognised the sound that had accompanied Jack's disappearance, and then there had been those warrants of apprehension for Jack, Martha Jones and the Doctor that had been broadcasted all over every TV station shortly before the mess on the Valiant.

And then Jack had come back. The others had been relieved and happy to have him back, and Ianto was too, to a certain degree. He was glad that Jack was back where Ianto could keep an eye on him, glad that he was back to be their leader – to tell the truth, he and Owen had constantly been arguing about how to proceed and what to do, and if that had lasted for another month Ianto was sure one of them would have been killed by the other. But a not so small part of him was angry.

Angry that Jack had left, just like that, as if none of them was worth a goodbye, and even angrier that he didn't even give an explanation when he returned. Gwen, Owen and Tosh had forgiven him everything the moment he strolled into the Hub, or so it seemed. But Ianto wasn't sure that he could just forgive and forget like that. He wasn't sure he _wanted_ to forgive and forget like that.

After all… he and Jack… they hadn't just been colleagues. They had been… Ianto wasn't sure what to call it. They hadn't been lovers. There never had been a promise of exclusivity. There never had been any mention of love or similar emotions. There had been flirting, still was, but sometimes Ianto supposed that Jack was just physically incapable of _not_ flirting with everything and everyone. And there had been sex.

The first time they had sex was after that awful excursion to the countryside. It had been all about comfort and reassurance that they were still alive. A way to banish the nightmares that were sure to come. Jack had never promised Ianto anything, never told lies, never demanded anything that he wasn't ready to give himself.

And at first Ianto had been content with this kind of – he couldn't even call it a relationship. Agreement, that was the right word. He had been content with their agreement. To tell the truth, Ianto highly doubted he would have been able to handle anything more than this. He still had been hurting after Lisa, and although he stopped blaming Jack for her death almost immediately after he had slept some hours and had been able to think clearly again, her loss still had hurt like acid in his veins.

It was just after Jack's death by Abbadon that Ianto realised that somewhere along the way he had fallen in love. He couldn't even say when that had happened. He just knew that losing Jack was just as painful as losing Lisa had been. Maybe even more so, because it hit him completely out of the blue. He had been crying for hours, sitting in Jack's office and clinging to his greatcoat.

And then Jack had been alive again, and he kissed him. Kissed him in front of the others, although he'd always been painstakingly careful to separate business from pleasure. No matter what they did after everyone else had gone home, neither Jack nor Ianto had ever behaved anything but professionally when Gwen, Owen or Tosh had been around.

Jack had broken this unspoken rule and kissed him in front of the others, and the kiss itself… They'd never just kissed for the sake of it. Kissing had always led to sex, and besides, stolen, hasty kisses in hidden corners, just because none of them could keep his hands off the other, that was something that lovers did. And they hadn't been. In love, that is.

But _this_ kiss… this kiss had been different. It had been sweet and tender and affectionate. Everything their former agreement hadn't been. And Ianto had started to think, started to hope that maybe, _maybe_, Jack could also feel something for him. That maybe Jack wasn't content with their somewhat cold agreement anymore, too.

He had been wrong. Apparently. Because only some hours after that Jack had gone with the Doctor, without a thought or a goodbye for his team, for _Ianto_. If Jack had been feeling something for him, if Jack had _cared_ for him, he wouldn't have vanished just like that. Even if there had been a good reason for him to go, he wouldn't have left without saying anything.

And so, in the months that followed, Ianto had tried not to be hurt. Had tried to convince himself that he hadn't been left, because Jack had never been his to begin with. Had tried to be reasonable. It hadn't really worked, but it had helped him to keep up appearances. He was pretty sure neither Tosh nor Gwen and Owen had noticed how much he missed Jack. And he had. He had really, really missed him.

At first he had hoped every day that Jack would come back to them, to him. Then he had hoped that he was happy, wherever he was now. Because it wasn't just a simple infatuation, he really loved Jack, and he wanted him to be happy. And then Jack had come back, and Ianto had realised that even though he was really glad to have him back, he couldn't just continue with their former agreement as if nothing had happened. Because he still loved Jack and now that he knew he loved him, having this cold only-sex-no-emotions-attached kind of relationship would hurt him even more than all this months that Jack had been away.

But Jack hadn't even tried to resume their late night activities. First Ianto had been anxious about it. He had toyed with the idea of leaving early, with Tosh maybe, so that he wouldn't be left alone with Jack. He wasn't so sure he could stay firm if Jack tried to seduce him, better to avoid every temptation. But there had been a lot of filing that had to be done, and Ianto normally always did the filing in the evenings, after Tosh, Gwen and Owen had left. There were just too many disturbances during the day. And not doing the filing on one day meant he would have twice the amount left on the next. He couldn't put it off indefinitely.

So he had discarded that idea and stayed behind, just as always. But Jack hadn't tried anything. He had smiled and thanked him for his late night coffee, but he hadn't tried to make Ianto stay. Hadn't tried to touch Ianto. Hadn't even made some innuendos.

Ianto had been… puzzled. Not that he _wanted_ to be seduced by Jack. Far from it. Or that he thought himself to be so irresistible. But it was just so out of character. Because they'd had fun, a lot of fun, when they'd been together, and the Jack he knew would at least try to have that again. If Ianto rejected him, Jack would respect it and wouldn't try to seduce him again, Ianto was pretty sure of that. But Ianto hadn't even had the chance to reject him, so why didn't Jack try anything?

Ianto snorted. Maybe that was what irked him so much. That Jack hadn't even given him the chance to say no. Maybe he'd wanted, _needed_ to say no, if only to have some kind of closure. It would be just his kind of luck that Jack had lost interest in him long before the reverse could happen.

But it wasn't just that, Ianto thought only moments later. Jack seemed to be more quiet, more withdrawn, more distant, even if Ianto seemed to be the only one who noticed it as Jack was his usual exuberant self whenever Tosh, Gwen and Owen were around. Sometimes Jack seemed to be absent minded. No, that wasn't the right word. Daydreaming? No, that wasn't it either. It was as if sometimes Jack would notice something only he could see or hear. As if he wasn't really there with them.

And he slept.

Ianto knew from personal experience that Jack only needed very little sleep, if anything at all. He could have counted the hours Jack slept in one week on one hand, and there would have been more than one finger left. But now…

Now Jack slept every night. Ianto knew because he came in just as early as ever and he had found Jack still sleeping in his quarters more than once. Not that Ianto thought it was a bad thing. It was just… strange.

Finally arriving in his street stopped Ianto's wandering thoughts. With a little sigh he parked his car, got out and locked it. He entered his house, kicked his shoes off and shuffled into the kitchen. He wasn't really hungry, but he was thirsty and so he fetched a bottle of water out of the fridge.

He drank half of the bottle on his way to his bedroom and put it down on his bedside table. Yawning he undressed, put the clothes into the laundry basket and put on a pair of pyjama bottoms, before he slipped under his blanket. He was tired, but unlike Jack Ianto hadn't been able to get a good nights sleep in weeks. Months. He was always tossing and turning, waking at the smallest noise and generally not getting any rest.

It took him some time to fall asleep this night, too, but when he finally did he found himself standing in a wide, grey plain. He couldn't make out a horizon or an edge. He couldn't even tell where the 'ground' ended and the 'sky' began. Everything was tinted in an identically shade of grey.

Ianto smiled. He hadn't had this particularly dream in months, and he'd missed it. He didn't know why, but every time he dreamed of this grey plain he woke up refreshed, calm and rested. Even if he'd had only some few hours of sleep.

He started walking, hoping to find something interesting. Even if it looked as if there was nothing than grey, as if he could see for miles, he knew it wasn't so. Sometimes he found big and breathtaking scenes like forests and oceans, sometimes small little things like puzzles and odd gadgets that could hold his attention forever, sometimes he found nothing but endless grey. It could jump at him out of nothing, suddenly and overwhelming, or he could see it in the distance and slowly getting closer. It was always new, always different. It was always peaceful.

This night, it seemed, it was one of the occasions he could see whatever he would find long before he reached it. Because after only two minutes of walking he could make out a shape, lying on the 'floor'. He couldn't make out what it was, he was too far away, but he thought it was approximately as big as he was tall. When he got nearer he could see that it was another human being, a man as far as he could say.

Ianto stopped for a moment, puzzled. He'd never met another person in this dreams before. It was always things and plants, but never people. Not even animals. This was definitely new. Slowly Ianto approached the man, just to stop and stare incredulously when he finally reached him.

It wasn't just any man. It was Jack.

He was lying on his back, the arms folded under his head and gazing into the 'sky'. He was humming quietly an unrecognisable melody. And, apparently, he hadn't noticed Ianto yet.

"Jack?" Ianto asked incredulously.

Jack turned his head and looked at Ianto. "Oh," he said and smiled. "Hello. Didn't see you there."

Ianto gaped at him. "What are you doing here?" Then he shook his head exasperated at himself. "Forget what I said. This is my dream, after all." It could hardly be dream-Jack's fault that he was here. Ianto made a note to have a serious talk with his subconsciousness after this. Wasn't it enough that he had to deal with Jack when he was awake?

"This is your dream?" Jack asked him, somewhat bewildered. "Are you sure?"

Ianto gave him a dry look, then he sat down beside him. "Of course it is."

"Ah, ok," Jack said and nodded. Then he turned his head back and looked again up in the 'sky'.

Ianto followed his gaze, but there was just grey. "What are you doing?" he finally asked, after minutes of silently staring at nothing.

"Watching," Jack answered.

Ianto stared at Jack for a moment, then he looked up again. Still only grey. "What are you watching?"

"Things. Snatches of… memories. I think."

Ianto narrowed his eyes, trying to see what Jack apparently was seeing. "Snatches of memories?" he finally asked. "Whose memories?"

"I don't know," answered Jack. "Mine, I thought, but then you said this is your dream. So maybe they're yours."

"And what are they showing?" A part of Ianto was shaking his head over the surrealism of this conversation, but the by far bigger part of him was strangely curious where it would lead.

"I'm not sure," Jack said. "They're blurry. I've been trying forever to get a clear picture. Then you came." Jack turned his head to look at Ianto again. He frowned, as if he was registering, _really_ registering, Ianto for the first time. "Who are you?"

Ianto looked at him incredulously. "I'm Ianto. You know who I am."

"No, I don't," was the puzzled answer. "Where do I know you from?"

"Jack!" Ianto said exasperated. Why on earth would he dream of a Jack, who didn't know him?

"What?" Jack answered in the same exasperated tone of voice. "I really don't know you, but you seem to know me, so maybe I just forgot, but I don't think so because I'm sure that I would remember you if I'd ever met you!" He finally took a breath and winked at him.

Ianto sighed. Well, _that_ surely was the Jack he knew. But that still didn't explain why he would dream of a Jack who didn't know him. Maybe he subconsciously wished he could make a new start with Jack, and this was the result of it?

"I'm Ianto," Ianto repeated, "and we work together."

"We do?" Jack asked. "So why would you dream of me? I mean, it's blatantly clear that I'm incredibly gorgeous and charming, anyone would dream of me, so no wonder there. But why would you want me to not know you?"

Ianto glared at Jack. "I don't know," he snapped. "Maybe I'm going crazy."

"People dream of me when they're going crazy?" Jack blinked. "Somehow that doesn't sound especially flattering."

"I don't know about people in general," Ianto answered. "But I'm pretty sure that it's just me who's so lucky."

"I see," Jack smiled his big, charming smile and rolled onto his side so he could see Ianto better. "And tell me, if we're really working together… do you like me?"

"At the moment? No."

"And at other times?" Jack's smile got even bigger, if that was possible.

"We're kind of… friends," Ianto finally answered. "I think. It's complicated." God, why the hell did he have to analyse his relationship with Jack now? And then with Jack of all people! Sometimes he hated his subconsciousness. "You are my boss. And we… I… It's complicated," he said again.

"Friends?" Jack asked, his head tilted. "Or… more than friends?"

Ianto glared at him again. "Friends," he said resolutely. "I think," he added immediately, his uncertainty showing itself. "I hope. I… Don't you have memories to watch or something like that?" he shouted almost desperately. He didn't want to talk about this, really not.

Jack chuckled. "You're far more interesting. So, sadly not more than friends," Jack let out an exaggerated disappointed sigh. "Shame on me." He paused for some moments, then he continued. "So, what do we do? The job, I mean."

"Torchwood," Ianto answered.

"Torchwood?" Jack tilted his head again. "What's that? Some kind of flashlight business?"

A short laugh escaped Ianto. "No," he said, still smiling. "We're hunting Aliens. To protect Earth."

"Really?" Jack asked. "Hunting Aliens, hm. Sounds kind of familiar…" He paused and frowned. "Sounds like something I would like."

"You do," Ianto confirmed. "I think it's all the running and shouting. You get grouchy if you can't hunt down at least one Weevil every other day. You don't like being locked up in the Hub all the time."

Jack stared at him incredulously. "You make me sound like some kind of dog," he finally complained.

Ianto grinned at him. "Well, now that you're mentioning it…"

Jack growled, then he laughed. "Ok, ok, I _do_ like running. Sets free all kind of endorphins and other happy hormones. Makes me horny, too." He leered.

Ianto rolled his eyes. "I should have known," he murmured, shaking his head. But he was still smiling, and didn't feel like stopping in the near future. Now, that all those uncomfortable questions about their relationship seemed to be over, he kind of liked talking with this Jack. He couldn't remember when he last had felt so relaxed and happy in Jack's presence. Or if ever. But here, with this Jack who didn't know him, he felt… good. It was such a simple word, but it expressed everything and exactly how he felt. If only the Jack outside of his dream could be like this one. Ianto knew, that it wouldn't be complicated at all to be friends with this Jack. Friends… and maybe even more.


	3. Chapter 2

**Title:** Sleeping Soul  
**Author:** Zanna  
**Disclaimer & warnings:** see prologue  
**Beta:** Laren & Koryou

**A/N:** Thank you to all who reviewed! You're the best!

* * *

**Chapter 2**

When his alarm sounded the next morning Ianto woke refreshed and well rested, just as expected. For a while he just lay there, thinking about the strange appearance of Jack in his dream and the even stranger conversation they'd had. He still wasn't sure what his subconscious wanted to tell him, but he knew it was no use thinking too much about it.

Sighing he got up and padded into his bathroom to take a quick shower. Afterwards he put on one of his suits, went outside to his car and started driving. He didn't bother to make breakfast – it was far too early in the morning for him to even be hungry. He would make himself something later, after he had a cup of coffee. The fridge in the small kitchen area in the Hub was always stocked with enough food to make some decent sandwiches; and as Ianto was the one who was responsible for filling it, it held mostly food he liked.

As always he was the first one to arrive in the Hub, not counting Jack, who was living there. But just as every day in the last week, the Hub was still dark and quiet when Ianto entered – obviously Jack wasn't up yet. Moving as quietly as he could Ianto went up to the kitchen area and started making coffee.

By the time he finished he could hear sounds coming from Jack's quarters, and when he entered Jack's office to bring him his first cup Jack was already sitting at his desk, apparently completely absorbed with the paperwork there. He answered Ianto's "Good morning, sir," with a fleeting smile when he put down the coffee but didn't look up at him. Ianto hesitated for a moment, then he turned around and went back to fetch himself a cup of coffee, too.

If Jack hadn't left them the way he did, Ianto maybe would have tried to talk to him, to find out what was troubling him. Because there clearly was something troubling Jack, Ianto was sure he knew him well enough to read his behaviour right. Even before their relationship had taken a more physical aspect he had always been able to read Jack's moods, sometimes even before Jack himself was aware of them. Probably because he was used to watching Jack very closely – first because he wanted to prevent him finding out about Lisa, then because he had to atone for endangering the world with another Cybermen invasion, and after that… probably because he liked watching Jack. Still did, if he had to be honest.

But that didn't matter anymore, or so Ianto told himself. His relationship with Jack wasn't like it had been before – they were strictly boss and employee now, nothing more. And even before Jack had vanished with the Doctor he'd never confided in Ianto – obviously, or his disappearance wouldn't have been such a surprise for him. Now Ianto wanted to keep his emotional distance, and showing concern would seriously interfere with this plan. Besides, it would feel weird – especially after that strange dream he had last night.

Thankfully it didn't take long for Tosh to arrive and Ianto was glad he had someone to talk to – or maybe more precisely, someone who distracted him from thinking too much about Jack. Owen and Gwen arrived sometime later too, and not long after that the four of them were off to investigate some strange readings they got, leaving Ianto on his own in the Hub. Not that he minded. Although he wasn't just the teaboy anymore; Jack had started to take him on field trips before he vanished, and after that being a field agent had been a necessity as they had been one team member short. But now and then Ianto enjoyed being left behind – he liked the quiet time he had then and he always put it to use by doing some necessary organisational tasks or simply sorting back the files the others always left lying around.

When the others finally came back again, Ianto was pleased with how much filing he had been able to finish during their absence; it meant he would be able to go home early for once, too. Apparently the strange reading the team had investigated had turned out to be genuine, because they came back with some strange alien artefact that had Tosh happily technobabbling without even taking a breath. Or so it seamed to Ianto's amusement.

The day ended just as ordinary and almost boring as it started – except for Tosh, of course – but Ianto wasn't really complaining. After all, an interesting day at Torchwood didn't necessarily mean good. With that thought Ianto locked the door of the Tourist Information and went to his car.

--

"Are you sure that this is your dream?"

Ianto sighed a little bit exasperated. Once again he was standing on the grey plains, with Jack in front of him, and this was the second time Jack had asked him this question – the third if he counted the dream of the night before. But unlike the night before he didn't seem to accept Ianto's affirmative answer quite as readily. Instead he frowned and looked at Ianto thoughtfully.

"So, why are you dreaming of me again?" he finally asked.

Ianto couldn't help himself and scowled angrily at Jack. He would have scowled at his subconscious, but unfortunately his subconscious didn't have a body. Unless this Jack he was dreaming of again was some sort of personification of his subconscious, in which case his scowling was directed just at the right person… subconscious… split personality… whatever.

"Can't get enough of me?" Jack nodded knowingly and smirked at Ianto. "Quite understandable."

"No!" Ianto gritted out. "It's not 'quite understandable'!"

"It's not?" Jack looked at him puzzled. "Why not? I thought you like me."

Ianto just pressed his lips together and silently counted to ten. It was no use to get angry with this Jack.

"Ianto?" Jack took a step closer. "Come on, talk to me. You said you like me yesterday. Did you lie?"

"No."

"Then what's the matter?" Jack tilted his head and looked at Ianto worriedly. That look was what made Ianto finally snap. Because the real Jack had never looked at him like that – like he really cared.

"You left me!" Ianto shouted. "You left! You just up and disappeared, without a sign, without a word, without a single thought what that meant for the team, what it meant for me! I wasn't even important enough for a 'Goodbye Ianto, it was nice,' to you! That's the matter!" Ianto stopped, breathing hard. He stared at Jack for a long moment who stared back with a shocked expression. "I wasn't important enough," Ianto finally finished and lowered his gaze.

"I… I left?" Jack's voice sounded unbelieving.

Ianto raised his eyes at Jack again. "Yes," he simply answered.

Jack looked positively distraught. "I… don't understand," he almost whispered.

Ianto sighed and closed his eyes. Apparently this emotional outbreak had only waited to happen. He just wasn't so sure how sensible it was to confront this Jack with his feelings about his disappearance. After all, it wasn't as if this Jack could change anything about it. He was just a figment of Ianto's imagination.

"Why didn't you tell me that last night?" Jack asked. "You said we were friends."

"I also said that it's complicated," Ianto answered and opened his eyes again. "You left, and if you'd stayed away everything would have been simpler. But you came back and now everything's… just… confusing."

After a long moment of silence Jack finally asked, "Why did I leave?"

"I don't know. You didn't tell us," Ianto answered. "You never tell us anything about you. And before you ask, you also didn't tell us why you came back. Not because of me, that's for sure," he added more to himself.

"Why would you say something like that?" Jack asked.

Ianto looked at him surprised. "You've been back for a week now. You had enough opportunities to talk to me or to otherwise show me if I had been the reason of your return." Ianto shrugged. "You didn't."

Again Jack just looked at him for a long time without saying anything. Then he lowered his eyes and quietly said, "I don't sound like a very nice person."

Ianto sighed again. Although this Jack wasn't real he nevertheless didn't want to hurt him – and just how pathetic was that? He raised his hand and placed it on Jack's shoulder. "But you are," he said.

Jack raised his head and arched one eyebrow.

"Maybe nice isn't the right word to describe you," Ianto corrected himself. "But you're not a bad person. You're not intentionally cruel. I know that you didn't do it just to hurt me. It's just that you didn't feel the same for me, and so I never really was a considering factor in your decisions. It hurts, but I will get over it."

Jack tilted his head and looked at Ianto searchingly. "I didn't feel the same? The same as what?"

Ianto stared at him but didn't say anything. He wanted to, he really did, but even though this wasn't the real Jack it still was difficult to talk about his feelings to him. He didn't think he could do it.

"Ianto?" Jack asked. "What do you feel for me?"

Ianto swallowed but still couldn't say anything. He couldn't even lower his gaze to stop looking directly into Jack's almost hypnotic blue eyes.

"You said we are friends now. Complicated friends," Jack hastily corrected when Ianto opened his mouth to object, "but friends. What have we been before I left?"

Ianto hesitated and Jack stepped closer. Just a centimetre more and they would be touching from head to toe. Ianto shivered a little, but didn't back away.

"Tell me," Jack murmured. "Were we lovers?"

"No," Ianto whispered. "We weren't lovers. We had an arrangement. To relieve stress… and to comfort…"

"An arrangement?" Jack asked and placed his right hand on Ianto's cheek. "That sound's awfully cold. Almost clinical."

"It wasn't," Ianto murmured. Jack's face was so close now he could almost taste his skin. "We had fun…"

Jack smiled, and the next second his mouth closed over Ianto's in a kiss. Ianto closed his eyes in bliss. This dream-Jack felt exactly like he remembered the real Jack – his lips, his taste, even his technique. It was the kiss itself that was different. Just like the kiss after Jack's death by Abaddon it was sweet and caring, almost loving. But at the same time it was hot, seductive and mind-blowing, just like the other kisses Jack had given him before. It was like an amalgamation of both and it was surely turning Ianto into a puddle of goo.

"Jack," Ianto murmured when Jack finally let him get some much needed breath. "Don't…"

"Don't?" Jack asked and kissed him again. "'Don't kiss me' or 'Don't stop'?"

Ianto actually needed some moments to understand what Jack was asking him. That Jack was nibbling and kissing down his neck and up again to his earlobe didn't really help him getting a clearer mind. "This is not a good idea…" he finally got out.

Jack actually stopped and leaned back to look at Ianto. "Do you really want me to stop?" he asked.

Ianto returned Jack's passionate look for a moment. Did he want him to stop? He wasn't sure. But what could be positively wrong in kissing this Jack? It was just a dream, there was no need to keep his distance. No need to push him away. So he wound his arms around Jack's neck instead, pulled him closer and pressed their lips together again.

--

To say that the next day at the Hub felt awkward would be the understatement of the year. Every time Ianto looked at Jack he remembered the kisses of his dream. Or when Jack talked. Or drank coffee. Or breathed. He didn't even have to be in the same room as Ianto – oh who was he kidding? There wasn't a single moment during the whole day when Ianto didn't think about the kisses he shared with his dream-Jack. They just seemed so real to him and he couldn't help blushing every time he thought how it would be if the real Jack would kiss him like that.

But there was no chance that would ever happen, Ianto knew that. Maybe that was the reason why those kisses had been so overwhelmingly good. They were just wishful thinking on his part. Nothing in reality could be that good – because that would be just unfair. If the real Jack had ever kissed him like that – Ianto was sure he would have forgiven him all and everything. Even thinking about this possibility made Ianto's mind reel.

That was just how Gwen found him – standing in the kitchen area, a forgotten cup of coffee in his hand and staring down at Jack with a wistful expression on his face.

Gwen looked at him for a moment, then followed his gaze. A pitying expression settled on her face. "Oh pet," she said and placed her hand on Ianto's arm. "Don't do this to yourself."

Ianto almost jumped at her touch. He hadn't noticed her entering the kitchen area and had been startled when she suddenly started to speak.

"You know Jack," she continued with a compassionate sigh. "He's just… Jack. It's not your fault he doesn't feel that way for you."

Ianto stared at her for a moment. Ever since Jack had kissed him in front of everyone and then vanished only hours later Gwen had made comments like this one. Always about how Jack wasn't the type to settle down and make commitments, how it wasn't Ianto's fault that Jack left and so on. To be honest, Ianto preferred Owen's jibes to Gwen's compassionate speeches. At least with Owen he knew where he stood. Gwen however… Ianto never knew if she was genuinely concerned for him or just plainly mean.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he finally said and turned his back to Gwen. He started to clean the coffee maker – not that it needed cleaning, but it gave him something to do whereas he could ignore Gwen.

Gwen didn't say anything else, just patted him on the back and left again. Ianto stayed a little longer in the kitchen but when he finally emerged he made a conscious effort to not think about last night's dream. He was a professional after all, and therefore he would act like one. Even if it made it look as if he avoided Jack.

For the rest of the day Ianto helped Tosh with the alien artefact they found the day before. There were some strange characters or symbols on one side of the artefact, and Ianto tried to find something similar in the archives. He hadn't found anything by the end of the day, but at least he had been able to eliminate six alien languages. Even if they might never be able to exactly tell where the artefact came from, at least they could find out where it didn't come from. That had to count as some kind of success, too.

When Ianto finally went home he almost dreaded to go to sleep. On the one hand he would really like to dream about Jack again – to kiss him again and maybe do even more than that. He couldn't have the real Jack, after all, so maybe he could be content with his dream substitute.

On the other hand, if he dreamt of Jack again and they would kiss again… Ianto wasn't sure he could survive another day like the one he just had. And if they did even more than kiss… No. He would never be able to look at Jack again without turning the colour of a tomato. Or jump Jack and ravish him right where he stood. Jack probably wouldn't object, but that would only create more problems than anything else.

But he couldn't delay going to sleep forever, and so he finally found himself dreaming again. And just like the last two nights it was about the grey plains. Ianto stared around incredulously. That was just impossible! He had never before had the same dream so often! Twice a week had been the most he had ever dreamt of the grey plains, and then never in such quick succession! And now he'd had this dream three nights in a row! Something wasn't right.

"Ianto!"

Ianto turned around and there was Jack again, just as he had almost feared. That were two discrepancies now – dreaming of the grey plains three nights in a row and Jack's appearance in every one of this dreams. He'd never before dreamt of the same things even twice when he was dreaming of the grey plains.

"Ianto, I have to talk to you!"

Ianto frowned. Jack looked worried and almost nervous. And something else seemed different, although Ianto couldn't really say what made him think that. "Jack?" he asked. "What's the matter?"

Jack grimaced. "This is going to sound really strange, but you have to believe me, Ianto." He grasped Ianto's upper arms and looked at him pleadingly.

"Jack? What's up?" Ianto asked again, alarmed by Jack's strange behaviour. "You're really worrying me here."

Jack took a deep breath as if to take courage, then he said, "I know it sounds unbelievable, Ianto, but this is not a dream."


	4. Chapter 3

**Title:** Sleeping Soul  
**Author:** Zanna  
**Disclaimer & warnings:** see prologue  
**Beta:** Laren & Koryou

**A/N:** Sorry for the delay. I blame it entirely on Koryou, who got me hooked on Supernatural. I just couldn't stop watching the episodes until I finished with Season 2. :-)

* * *

**Chapter 3**

"What?" Ianto stared at Jack incredulously.

"This is not a dream," Jack repeated and gestured around.

"Not a dream?" Ianto frowned. "Of course it is a dream."

"No it's not," Jack insisted. "It's real."

"Real? What do you mean, real?" Ianto began to feel as if he somehow only got half of the conversation or something like that. Because nothing Jack said made any sense.

"Real as in reality," Jack answered and paused for a moment to frown thoughtfully. "It's not a dream, you're not dreaming me and I'm not just a figment of your imagination," he explained finally.

Ianto stared a moment at Jack, then he shook his head and took a step back. "That's nonsense. Of course I am dreaming – what else would I be doing? I went to bed, I fell asleep, so this _has_ to be a dream."

"But it's not," Jack said stubbornly.

"Then what is it?" Ianto exclaimed somewhat frustrated.

"It's the Elysion," Jack answered.

"The what?" Ianto asked. "The Elysion? As in Elysian fields?"

"Yes… sort of."

"That makes even less sense," Ianto said. "I'm not dead, and neither are you – at least at the moment – so why should we be in heaven?"

"The Elysion is not Heaven," Jack explained. "It's a kind of mistranslation."

"Mistranslation?" Ianto stared at Jack for a moment. "I admit I'm not exactly fluent in ancient Greek but I'm fairly sure that the Elysian fields derive from the Greek word 'elysion' and are generally associated with the Christian Heaven."

"I don't mean that you mistranslated it," Jack answered. "It was the Greeks who mistranslated, or to be more precisely misinterpreted the word."

When Ianto only stared at him incomprehensibly he sighed. "Elysion is actually a Sylvian word. The Sylvians are a telepathic race and they already had been frequenting the Elysion for centuries when they visited Earth some millennia ago. The ancient Greeks thought the Elysion to be a place where only the heroic and virtuous souls go after they die – since they couldn't visit it like the Sylvian did."

"The Sylvians," Ianto said after a moment.

"Yes," Jack nodded.

"And they are… aliens?"

Jack nodded again. "They're from the planet Sylvia."

"Ok, now I know you're making things up," Ianto said. "The planet _Sylvia_???"

"What?" Jack asked and grinned. "There are far worse names for planets out there. I mean, compared to Raxacoricofallapatorius it's a pretty easy name to say."

Ianto closed his eyes and shook his head. "There must be something seriously wrong with me for having such dreams," he murmured while he rubbed his temples to stop the headache he could feel coming. Why he would have a headache in his dream was beyond his comprehension, but compared to what his dream-Jack was telling him it seemed fairly normal, all in all. "I'm going crazy. Or it's a brain tumour."

"I told you, this is not a dream," Jack said and tilted his head to look at Ianto questioningly. "Why don't you believe me?"

Ianto opened his eyes and stared at him incredulously. "Because it's impossible?" he said.

"No it's not!" Jack shouted clearly frustrated. "How can I make you believe me?"

Ianto stared at him for a moment, then he said, "Prove it."

"What?"

Ianto shrugged. "You say this is not a dream, so prove it."

"And how should I prove it?" Jack asked.

Ianto shrugged again. "You're the one who insists that this is real, you think of something."

"Ok," Jack mused, "What if I tell you something only I would know?"

"But if you tell me something only you would know, how will I know if it's true?" Ianto argued. "And if you tell me something only we both know then it's no proof at all. As a figment of my imagination you would naturally know everything I know."

When Jack didn't reply anything, Ianto continued, "And if this is real, why didn't you say something when we were awake? You had every opportunity to say something at work yesterday, but you didn't even hint at anything like this. That just doesn't make any sense."

Jack stared at him for a long time, then he said, "Are you always this difficult?"

"I'm not difficult!" Ianto snapped. "I'm just trying to make you see reason." Oh god, now he finally lost it. He was arguing with himself. The going-crazy-theory was starting to sound more and more likely.

"Look," Jack said und sighed wearily. "I don't know why I don't remember being here with you when I'm awake. Hell, I don't even know why I'm here with you to begin with, I mean…" He stopped and shook his head. "God, this is just strange and… frustrating. It's as if my mind is wrapped in some kind of big cloud or something like that. I can't remember clearly, and _what_ I remember doesn't really fit. Everything's just so – fuzzy."

Ianto watched as Jack started to pace up and down in front of him, mumbling something under his breath that Ianto couldn't understand.

"And then there's that," Jack suddenly exclaimed without stopping to pace. "You said we were working together, for an organisation named 'Torchwood'. Protection Earth from alien invasions. Protecting Earth is what I do, that's true, but not for Torchwood! I'm a Time Agent, I work for the Time Agency."

"The Time Agency?" Ianto frowned. "I've never heard of an organisation with that name."

"See?" Jack stopped and looked at Ianto upset. "That's just what I mean! It just doesn't fit! I don't understand it – and I don't know what to do."

Ianto didn't really know what he could answer to that, so he said nothing.

--

Ianto was thinking about the strange dream he'd had all the next day long. From the moment he brought Jack his first coffee he was waiting, almost expecting, for Jack to say something. Every time Jack opened his mouth to talk to Ianto he was prepared to hear that Jack had dreamt of him last night – and strangely disappointed every time it didn't happen.

It was completely impossible, of course, but the Jack in his dream had been so sure that it wasn't a dream that Ianto couldn't help but wonder. What if it _was_ true? What would that mean? And how could he find out for sure? What had Jack said last night? That he worked for an organisation named Time Agency? Well, the easiest way would surely be to walk right over to Jack and ask him about this Time Agency.

But what if it wasn't true? Jack would think him completely nuts if he started to question him about some imaginary agency. That would be embarrassing at best. And what if it was true? How could he explain to Jack where he got the information from? Jack was always so secretive, almost paranoid with his past; Ianto didn't think Jack would react overly positive to his explanation of 'You told me in a dream.'

So when Jack joined him and Tosh at her workstation where they were still puzzling over the alien device and asked them if they'd already found out something, Ianto went with his instinct. "I'm not completely sure but I think I've seen something similar like this in the archives of Torchwood One. If I remember correctly there was a cross-reference to an entry about something called Time Agency," he said. His talent to make something up the minute he opened his mouth – and making it sound actually believable – had come in really handy when he had been hiding Lisa. And it was surely handy now, too.

"Time Agency?" Tosh asked and raised her head from the artefact, frowning. "I've never heard of an organisation with that name. Are you sure about that?"

Ianto shrugged. "Not a hundred per cent. I've never seen the alien artefact myself, I stumbled over it while doing research for something else. I don't even know if it survived the Cybermen Invasion or where it is now."

Ianto, who had been watching Jack from the corner of his eyes, had noticed the minuscule stiffening of Jack's body the moment he mentioned the Time Agency. And he knew Jack well enough to interpret it right. The little jerk, Jack's overly attentive gaze on Ianto, the little frown that only someone who was watching him very carefully would notice – it all said that Jack had heard the name 'Time Agency' before.

"Too bad," Tosh sighed. "We could use a little push in the right direction." Then she bent back over the artefact.

"I'm going back down to the archives," Ianto said. "Maybe I'll finally find something."

Tosh just hummed something vaguely affirmative but didn't even look up when Ianto walked towards the stairs that led down to the archives. Jack on the other hand – Ianto could feel his eyes following him through the whole hub, almost burning into his back.

Therefore he wasn't really surprised when he could hear Jack's voice only just before he reached the archive's door.

"Ianto!" Jack called.

Ianto stopped and turned around. "Sir?" he asked.

"Ianto," Jack repeated and stepped closer. "Can you remember what the entry exactly said about the Time Agency?"

"I'm sorry," Ianto said. "I didn't read the entry. As I said, I did research on something else and just stumbled across it by accident. Why do you ask? Is it important?"

"No, no," Jack said hastily. "I'm just… curious. That's all."

"Alright," Ianto said. When Jack didn't immediately turn around and go back to the main hub but kept on staring at Ianto with that odd expression on his face, Ianto frowned and tilted his head questioningly. "Is there anything else, sir?"

Jack stared another moment at him, then he said almost hesitating, "If… if you'll stumble across any mention of the Time Agency again… please inform me, alright?"

Ianto nodded his head once, and after Jack stared at him some moments longer he finally turned around and went back upstairs. Ianto opened the door to the archives and slowly walked inside. Inside his head the thoughts kept tumbling over each other. He had a lot to think of.

Jack knew of the Time Agency, that was sure. His reaction when Ianto mentioned it, and the strange conversation only moments before – they were sure signs to Ianto of Jack hiding something. Or at least, not telling everything.

So, what did that mean? There was no way he could have made that up. It would be too much of a coincidence if his subconscious invented something like a 'Time Agency' only to discover later that it was real. And he was sure he hadn't heard somewhere of this Time Agency and then forgotten about it, only to have it resurface in his dreams. Again it would be too much of a coincidence that he would accidentally connect it with Jack – and be right about it. That left pretty much only one option.

Ianto sat down hard on one of the chairs that were standing around the table in the middle of the archives. The Jack in his dream had told the truth. The Jack in his dream wasn't a dream. He was real. Ianto braced his head on his hands. And that meant… it meant… Ianto didn't really know what it meant. He had a lot of questions, though.

Why was Jack in his dreams? What did he want from Ianto? And why didn't he remember when he was awake? Ianto didn't have any problems remembering the dreams – if he could still call them dreams. And how could dreams he'd had all his life suddenly not be dreams at all? Just what the hell was going on here?

Ianto sighed and rubbed his face tiredly. It was no use to agonise too much about it now. There was only one way he could find out for sure.

--

"Alright," Ianto said. "Explain it to me."

Jack, who had been standing with his back to Ianto, his hands in his pockets and gazing into the grey endlessness, turned around sharply and looked at Ianto somewhat surprised. "You're back!" he exclaimed and smiled.

"Yes, well," Ianto said and rolled his eyes slightly. As if he had a choice where he ended up when he was dreaming. "Explain it to me," he repeated.

"Explain what?" Jack asked.

"Why are you here? In this… place. What do you want? And why don't you remember when you're awake?"

"So you believe me?" Jack beamed.

"Well, let's say I'm not completely averse to the idea that this could be real anymore," Ianto answered.

"Just like I said - difficult," Jack muttered and shook his head amused. "Alright," he continued louder, "what do you want to know?"

Ianto thought for a moment, then he said, "This place. Why are you here? You said that only these aliens, the Sylvians could enter the Elysion. How come you can, too?" Ianto stopped for a moment and frowned. "When I think about it – how come _I_ am here? Because I'm really sure I'm not a Sylvian."

"Well," Jack answered, "the Elysion isn't accessible for Sylvians exclusively. They were just the first species to use it – as far as we know. In fact, everyone who has a specific psychic ability can access it."

"What psychic ability?" Ianto asked.

"Telepathy," Jack answered with a shrug. "And empaths, too, if they're really strong."

"Wait," Ianto said and shook his head. "What are you getting at? Are you implying that _you_ are a telepath? And that I am, too? That's impossible."

"Why would that be impossible?" Jack blinked at him, obviously surprised by Ianto's words.

"Because…" Ianto started and took a deep breath before he continued, "even if I accept the absurd idea of telepaths as real, there is no way you could be one."

"How could you be so sure of that?" Jack asked him, clearly astonished.

"…I just know," Ianto insisted. It just couldn't be. Because if Jack had been a telepath then the whole mess with Lisa never would have happened the way it did.

"But I am," Jack assured him. "I am a telepath – or at least I _was_."

"That makes even less sense," Ianto said. "And what about me? I'm pretty sure I would have noticed if I was able to read other people's thoughts. No," Ianto shook his head again. "There are no telepaths. At least not human ones."

"What? Of course there are," Jack said and looked at Ianto bewildered. "Sure, the human race developed those skills pretty late, and not everyone has them, but telepaths and empaths have been acknowledged for over thousand years know. How could you think that they don't exist?"

"What?" It was Ianto's turn now to look bewildered. "What are you talking about?"

"I thought it was a matter of common knowledge," Jack said. "Telepaths, empaths and other psychics were officially acknowledged after the Psychic Riots in 3996. By now every human colony, no matter how isolated, has at least one school where psychics can train their skills."

"Wait," Ianto raised his hand to stop Jack and give his spinning head a break. "Did you say – _3996_?"

"Yes," nodded Jack.

Ianto stared at him for a moment, completely flabbergasted. "Jack?" he finally said. "Which year is it?"

"What?" Jack looked at him surprised. "Which year? Don't you know?"

"Please," Ianto said weakly, starting to have an uneasy sense of Jack's answer. "Just tell me."

Jack blinked, still surprised, but answered nonetheless. "5078."

Ianto's legs buckled and he dropped down right were he stood. For the next minutes he could do nothing else than sit there and stare up at Jack. Suddenly a lot of things began to make sense.


End file.
